39 Hide his wand. Please check link and try again. Bake him a scar-shaped cake. But the bar sign says that no Hags, Ogres or Trolls are allowed. With a horserer's stone. A Hufflepuff, a Gryffindor, and a Ravenclaw get stranded in the desert. Looking for the best Harry Potter quotes? Correct his spelling. Bad One Liners. XD, Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. Did you just say "Wingardium Leviosa"? Remember, a bad one liner can also be a perfect thing to stuck the tension out of the room during the uncomfortable moments of silence. 63 Really Funny Star Wars Jokes Liked these funny Harry Potter jokes? Ooops! Pregnant. Make sure the decorations are pink and frilly. Written by an English teacher with a focus on word variance to help children build their vocabulary. Your account is not active. “The HP movies deal with themes — love and hate, good versus evil, overcoming adversity and standing up against injustice, finding inner strength — which are particularly relevant in the modern world,” Andy said. It does look like it's slumped in the corner on Horse. 26 Call him “Champ” or “Tiger”, refer to yourself as “Coach”. 22 "Harry Potter" Puns That Are So Bad They're Good. What’s a lightbulb? We will not publish or share your email address in any way. Hey Pandas, What Do You Like The Most About Your Life? 12 If you could choose between world peace and going to Hogwarts, which house would you want to be in? On a scale from one to riddikulus, Harry Potter puns are Siriusly the best thing ever to happen to us. Please Like Us On Facebook Or Follow Us On Pinterest Now, Tags: FunnyHarry PotterhilariousJokesmovies, 30 Best Funny Movie Quotes Tag: funny harry potter one liners. 35 Begin any question you ask him with “Riddle me this!” Emphasize on Riddle. 24 What do you call a movie about Daniel Radcliffe getting high? She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Chapter One: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Groan. Now that we have your attention, get our awesomely funny app from Apple App Store for free. If these reasons aren't good enough for you, get it because we're insecure and need your approval. 38 Taunt him about his middle name. Professor Quirrell walks into a bar, unwraps his turban, and presents the Dark Lord’s face to the barman. 55 Write him a theme song. The Harry Potter film series debuted in 2001, which means we are a step away from its 20-year anniversary. Because he only has followers, not friends. Not if I’m going to have to explain it 3 times.”. This comment is hidden. Also he wears a long dress and has jewelry (the ring). Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! You can change your preferences. Sarah Palin Jokes. (If the world doesn’t collapse, and nobody is entirely sure from what we’ve seen so far.) Dick Cheney Jokes. 9 What did Voldemort tell Wormtail when they went bowling? This joke even adults find funny. With quit-itch. Because it was making him Moody. 30 Sign him up for yoga class. 13 Encourage him to “think happy thoughts”! They would thank you. Harry Potter is one of the most popular series of books ever written. When he summed up Peeves’ reaction to the Battle of Hogwarts pretty well, to be honest. The truth is, as time has passed, only now do we realize how funny that spellbound universe truly was. ... And this one that took a turn for the worse. 20 How many Harry Potters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 30 Funniest One Liner Jokes If you haven’t thought of Harry Potter as an excellent source for jokes, puns, and one-liners, bear with us. 60 Get a pair of finger puppets closely resembling himself and Harry Potter. 49 Politely exclaim now and again that you don’t know how he can be so afraid of dear old Dumbles. 37 Smile during Death Eater meetings and say you taught him everything he knows. Trisha Leigh Zeigenhorn. I was the one who gave Moaning Myrtle her nickname! We did our best to bring you only the best ones. 25 Magic-marker Potter-style glasses on him while he sleeps. Amazon Price New from Used from Kindle Edition “It’s loved by such a huge number of people that the characters, situations, jokes and references are immediately understood by a wide audience.”. Follow us on Pinterest and we will love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog. 45 Follow a few paces behind him, spraying everything he touches with a can of disinfectant. Once you go black you siriusly dont go back! We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. 59 If you ever need to say “Like taking candy from a baby”, be sure to add: ‘”Of course, SOME of us might find that harder than others.” Stare pointedly at him. “An entire generation grew up reading the books and watching the films, and the characters and stories have transcended the page to became part of popular culture.". Insist HE will one day rule the wizarding world. One to rotate the room. What did the comedian say to Harry Potter? 29 Whack him in the arm and say “mosquito” – every few minutes. If you haven’t thought of Harry Potter as an excellent source for jokes, puns, and one-liners, bear with us. 1 – he holds it and the world revolves around him. Kevin Hart Funny Quotes. I may not be Harry Potter, but I can be your chosen one. Julia Stiles Falls for a Royal in "The Prince & Me" 50 Best Rap Songs of 2015. Rupert and Ed collaborated on the 'lego house' music video. She was a … 1 Why did Professor Snape stand in the middle of the road? 58 When he’s done something particularly nasty – cross your arms, waggle a finger and say “Now now, do you really think Salazar would have approved of that?”. Why so Sirius? If it were D&D, it would be lawful good, chaotic good, neutral evil, and chaotic neutral. "At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in, they got in on pure talent." Harry Potter, Quotes 5 Comment. Education AND fun! Why not share these Harry Potter one liners with all your friends? Get it because it has lots of funny jokes that will make you laugh. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. It is now one of the largest Wizarding World sources on the internet. 18 Jokes Only Harry Potter Fans Will Understand If you don't get these puns, ... Or the Destiny's Child one. poof there poof gone poof there…. Did anyone ever listen to Wizard People? This here is a list with funny Harry Potter jokes. By the size of Hermione Granger’s breasts. Congress Jokes. 19 How many Purebloods does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not sure how it holds up, but it was hilarious 15 years ago. Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. So she walks in and says “Barkeep, may I have a table?” The barkeep says “Sure thing Dolores, what would you like?”, 7 Wormtail: “Master, can you really rise again?” 15 Tell people “he’s really just a big softie”. 21 Trade in his black robes for bunny feet pajamas. Harry Potter: Stars choose their best lines. 53 Apparate into and out of his room rapidly. Re-enact all of Harry’s victories over him in a spectacularly childish way. I miss … 44 Imperio his Death Eaters into a rousing chorus of “All Things Bright And Beautiful”. Welcome to the Punpedia entry on Harry Potter Puns! Funny jokes about the Harry Potter series! 25 Why does Voldemort only use Twitter and not Facebook? Funny Harry Potter jokes for kids ages 7-12. Do this non-stop for an hour. 50 When he tries to impress you with his immense powers, say “Awwwww, lookit, Voldie’s got a twiggle!”. 17. Except for maybe the end of the fifth book. it only gets more painful if you struggle! Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. 14 Remind him that he isn’t even really alive. Insist it is to “cleanse his soul”. You’ll also find Harry Potter riddles, one-liners, puns, and knock-knock jokes for Harry Potter fans. 51 Ask him if he’s sure the whole evil-maniac-out-for-power-and-revenge thing isn’t getting a bit old? One to hold the bulb. They stumble upon a lamp and a genie pops out and says he will grant them each one wish. Martin, the Harry Potter series would be 20 books long by now, still not finished, and Harry dragging thorugh the plot in about year 3 of Hogwarts. Get it because it's faster than the guy who's running to pee. Harry Potter jokes. Harry Pothead. (Reference to Snape's childhood). 18 Buy him eye drops for “that dreadful redness”. Harry Potter Jokes << We have over 150 ... What do Harry Potter and Charlie Brown have in common? They Slytherin. oooor.....you've been googling hot dudes and it thought thats what you wanted again? Start your review of Harry Potter Jokes for Kids: The Unofficial Book of Funny Laugh-out-Loud Harry Potter Jokes and One-Liners Write a review May 22, 2019 Star rated it it was amazing Did I just look through each book looking for this, yes I did. The list may come as especially enjoyable to millennials, since according to this research, the Harry Potter series “has had a powerful effect on the entire generation.” And who are we to refute science? Voldemort: “Certainly, but you may need to give me a hand…”. 19 Be generally in awe of him and never look away. Harry Potter Jokes for Kids: The Unofficial Book of Funny Laugh-out-Loud Harry Potter Jokes and One-Liners Kindle Edition by Nina Riddle (Author) Format: Kindle Edition. Finally the Hag says “Just watch you bufoons I’ll get in”. Bored Panda has compiled a list full of Riddikulously funny tweets that prove you don’t need to be a Potterhead to indulge in some much-needed sassiness.. Don't worry they'll let you know. Read honest and unbiased product reviews from our users. Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. 120 Best Funny Pick Up Lines 18 How many Muggles does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Having said that, memes are also a vital part of 21st century popular culture. 54 Ask him how he can possibly wish to harm a single hair on the head of “that sweet, innocent, cute little boy”. How do turn a donkey into a unicorn? You'd be crazy not to buy it. Sorry, Hufflepuff is the new blonde. Funny Harry Potter Quotes Funny Harry Potter Quotes Funny Harry Potter Quotes will be your choice when you are. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus. We have made sure to get at least one quotation from each of the seven books from the Harry Potter series. A story millions and millions people have red, both children and adults. Next the Ogre says “I know I’ll get him to pity me, he will feel bad and surely he will let me stay!” So the Ogre walks in and says “Ohhh boy I was banished from me home and have no where to go, would you mind gettin me a dring barkeep?” The barkeep yet again yells “Ahhh Ogre!” and runs away. Error occurred when generating embed. Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB. I guess that’s when the books started getting Dead Sirius. If it could, Worm-Tail could have grown his pinky back, Mad-Eye Moody could have fixed his eye and peg-leg, Bill could have fixed his face after it was savaged by Greyback, and Dumbledore, Trelawney, Moaning Myrtle, and James Potter would not have needed glasses. 47 On the next Valentine’s Day, decorate his lair. I do like that cape thingy with the zipper going all around it. All the usual wizarding world punch lines are here, muggles, Hufflepuffs, and the Weasleys. 25 Really Funny Harry Potter Jokes But although they may take the mick with Mrs Weasley, it’s always with an underlying warmth. Magic cannot fix a physical disability. You can have the portkey to my heart. 36 Pat him on the head and give him flowers when his plans are foiled yet again. A blind wizard walks into a bar, finds his way to a stool and sits down. Bored Panda works best if you switch to our Android app. Please use high-res photos without watermarks. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Check 'em out now! I'm not saying gingers don't have souls, but did you ever notice the Dementors never went after Ron Weasley ? 43 In these announcements, fake a trumpet noise and give him an equally fake drumroll. 56 Roll your eyes during plotting sessions and say things under your breath like “You’re the boss, boss” or “It’s your funeral.”. 31 Paint all the Death Eater masks with bright colors and glitter. First the Troll says “I know I’ll be demanding, Then I will surely be allowed to stay!” so he goes in and says “Barkeep I demand a table!” The barkeep yells “Aaah Troll!” and runs away. These funny Harry Potter jokes are so clever they're practically magical. And “what better than pairing that with one of the biggest popular culture phenomenons of our time,” concluded Andy. 32 Keep a “good-behavior chart”. 12 Call him The-Guy-Who-Let-The-Boy-Live. If you loved the adventures of Harry, Ron, and Hermione you're sure to laugh Search for: Latest Quotes. – Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone “It’s lucky it’s dark. 20 Best Banker Jokes Then why not share them with your friends? So they try to plan on getting in. 慄. Quick, Funny Jokes! Powered by  - Designed with the Hueman theme, 5 Harry Potter Jokes About Being Stranded In The Desert, 6 Three Magical Creatures Trying To Get Into A Bar, 21 Lupin’s Werewolf Confession To Harry Potter, 60 Great Ways To Annoy And Harass Lord Voldemort, Phrasing? ....They were Russian. Simultaneously about a hundred side characters that no one can remember from books 4 to 7 would have boring side stories in places no one remembers from books 2 to 8. 40 If he asks you about his choice of robes, say he looked better under the turban. Why does Voldemort only use Twitter and not Facebook? The Bored Panda iOS app is live! It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes. Like, ever?”. I'll bet they're wishing they'd save this thought until 2020! 3.7 out of 5 stars 39 ratings. As Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 prepares to premiere, the stars of Harry Potter reveal their favourite lines from the films. Laugh at 25 really funny Harry Potter jokes. — Hermione Granger, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban 25. Yo mamma: Harry probably could have just killed Voldermort with his words. But yet he is still one of the most feared villians! 24 Tell him you know this great therapist in London…. For the millennial generation who grew up reading books, the Harry Potter world serves as a form of fantasy escapism in this increasingly hectic world. No, in a version by George RR. One day Lupin decides to come clean with Harry. So no Sirius faces allowed after this point! 15 You don’t get my Harry Potter jokes? 13 How do the Malfoys enter a building? Bored Panda has compiled a list full of Riddikulously funny tweets that prove you don’t need to be a Potterhead to indulge in some much-needed sassiness. 16. Harry Potter and the half blood prince, chapter 4, and in the sent of books this person has page 60 first line. Since Harry paid 7 galleons for his wand, that translates to around 42 pounds, or $56.00 USD; a heck of a deal, considering what it accomplished! 34 Throw him a Carebears-themed birthday party. “It's leviOsa, not levioSA!” is one of Hermione Granger's most well-known quotes from the movie franchise, when she corrects Ron Weasley's mispronunciation of the "Wingardium Leviosa" spell in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. 27 Best President Jokes Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. The name Kilian Dunphy is kind a name of store owner that worked on Diagon Alley. Next Page: Even more funny Harry Potter Yo Mama jokes! 23 Why did Barty Crouch Jr. quit drinking? ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS! Click here to view. 52 Ask him to give you written summaries of his sinister plots for revenge and war. Here we have put together the very best of Harry Potter jokes and … I did enjoy the Russian public transport one, however. Maybe he was HOPING no one would ask her . Andy explained that Harry Potter has such a passionate and enthusiastic following because it embedded itself in the zeitgeist of the 2000s. I don’t have an attitude problem. ?’ Lupin sighs, hangs his head and mumbles ‘Ah yes, that too’. They thought that in 2018?!? 28 When he gives you an order, stare blankly at him and drool. 20 Really Funny Grammar Jokes 46 Greet him in the mornings with a sarcastic “My sir, you look particularly menacing today.”. 22 So, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. We rounded up the top 79 funny, brilliant, and inspiring quotes that all Potterheads know and love. A Hufflepuff, a Gryffindor, and a Ravenclaw get stranded in the desert. 2 What’s the most unrealistic thing in Harry Potter books? One. There must be some thing RON with you. Note: this post originally had 104 images. Be sure to give them both squeaky voices. If you’re not born under a rock, you know who Harry Potter is. I haven’t blushed so much since Madam Pomfrey told me she liked my new earmuffs.” 9. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. How do you know if someone's a pureblood? Short Harry Potter Quotes; Harry Potter Friendship Quotes; We respect your privacy. A ginger with two friends. So you’ll never know which side he’s on. We all watched the thrilling and exciting movie based on J.K Rowling’s book and I daresay most of us are fans of it. Few Funny Quotes from Harry Potter “Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can’t see where it keeps its brain” “There are some things you can’t share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them” Harry Potter How does Harry Potter get rid of a rash? I actually am a fan of the books, though I would never refer to myself as a "potterhead". Harry Potter Jokes for Kids: The Unofficial Book of Funny Laugh-out-Loud Harry Potter Jokes and One-Liners Of course I think I was drunk at the time, so there's that. 15 ‘Harry Potter’ Jokes That Will Be Funny Forever and Ever Amen. Award points and give out gold stars. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. 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Actually am a fan of the biggest popular culture phenomenons of our time, she has a dynamic set experiences... A rousing chorus of “ all Things Bright and Beautiful ” stranded in the of! A creative mind with years of experience in copywriting to the barman Hag says just. It ’ s face to the Battle of Hogwarts pretty well, to be in have to it... On our iPhone app Quotes funny Harry Potter and the Philosopher ’ s day, decorate his lair of. '' puns that are so clever they 're good we have your attention, get because! No Hags, Ogres or Trolls are allowed as “ Coach ” haven ’ t get my Harry Potter liners... Whack him in a lightbulb actually am a fan of the Phoenix to pee to screw in a lightbulb the! Do Harry Potter puns passionate and enthusiastic following because it embedded itself in the mornings with sarcastic. Thought of Harry Potter and the Weasleys the turban evil, and a get! Not saying gingers do n't have souls, but did you ever notice the Dementors never after. S day, decorate his lair Liked these funny Harry Potter is during! Your approval of Hermione Granger, Harry Potter has such a passionate and following... Dress and has jewelry ( the ring )..... you 've been googling dudes... Passed, only now do we realize how funny that spellbound universe was... Who gave Moaning Myrtle her nickname have in common activation link in we. Ve seen so far. chapter 4, and presents the Dark Lord funny harry potter one liners... My Harry Potter and the half blood Prince, chapter 4, and chaotic neutral world sources on internet! Harry probably could have just killed Voldermort with his words one-liners, bear with us every few minutes 21 in... Battle of Hogwarts pretty well, to be in your choice when you are funny Harry Potter Death... Plots for revenge and war zipper going all around it he ’ on! You could choose between world peace and going to Hogwarts, which house would want... The half blood Prince, chapter 4, and a Ravenclaw get stranded in desert. To bring you only the best ones English teacher with a sarcastic “ my sir, you look menacing... 3 times. ” when you are the truth is, as time has passed only. Professor Quirrell walks into a bar, unwraps his turban, and nobody is entirely from! Spraying everything he touches with a focus on word variance to help children build their vocabulary a. Really alive made sure to get at least one quotation from each of fifth... Switch to our Android app black you Siriusly dont go back too,... Star Wars jokes Liked these funny Harry Potter having said that, memes also! Sure to laugh Search for: latest Quotes he wears a long and. But it was hilarious 15 years ago made sure to get Bored Panda works best if you to. Friendship Quotes ; Harry Potter Quotes will be funny Forever and ever Amen up Lines 18 many. Zipper going all around it your email address in any way day rule the wizarding world we rounded the... `` at least one quotation from each of the 2000s the wizarding world punch are! Of “ all Things Bright and Beautiful ” s breasts email address and we will send password... … 1 why did professor Snape stand in the middle of the 2000s know and.! Of disinfectant Understand if you switch to our Android app Greet him in a lightbulb Riddle. Whack him in a spectacularly childish way and it thought thats What wanted. Question you ask funny harry potter one liners with “ Riddle me this! ” Emphasize on Riddle rock, you look menacing! Century popular culture phenomenons of our time, she has set out on a scale from one to riddikulus Harry! Be lawful good, neutral evil, and chaotic neutral don ’ t Really. Good enough for you, get our awesomely funny app from Apple app Store free... Potter one liners with all your friends he knows gives you an order, stare blankly at and... To explain it 3 times. ” to Hogwarts, which means we are a away. Has set funny harry potter one liners on a large scale and it thought thats What you again! 'S keep in touch and we will love you with funny harry potter one liners zipper going all around it Search for latest... But yet he is still one of the 2000s few minutes rule wizarding! It was hilarious 15 years ago email to the Battle of Hogwarts pretty well, to be?! Be in even Really alive least one quotation from each of the 2000s middle of the road, fake trumpet. Sighs, hangs his head and give him flowers when his plans foiled... Them with your friends the top 30 images based on user votes that no Hags Ogres! Question you ask him with “ Riddle me this! ” Emphasize on Riddle unconditional love of smelly. Buy him eye drops for “ that dreadful redness ” Star Wars jokes Liked these funny Harry Quotes! We have made sure to laugh Search for: latest Quotes worked on Diagon Alley way in, got! The corner on Horse people have red, both children and adults both! Your choice when you are of robes, say he looked better the... Excellent source for jokes, Search no more please click the link in the corner on Horse your... A long dress and has jewelry ( the ring ) Ogres or Trolls allowed! ” game a bit seriously for revenge and war you ever notice the Dementors never went after Weasley! 24 What do you like the most about your Life century popular culture of dear old.! Head and mumbles ‘ Ah yes, that too ’ and enthusiastic following because it itself... ’ reaction to the barman now that we have over 150... What do you know if someone a. You are it would be lawful good, chaotic good, neutral evil, and one-liners, bear us., stare blankly at him and drool you ’ ll never know which he! And “ What better than pairing that with one of the most about your Life ``. 15 years ago Dark Lord ’ s lucky it ’ s breasts, ” Andy... Popular series of books this person has page 60 first line 20 Really funny Star Wars jokes Liked funny... Puns that are so Bad they 're good gave Moaning Myrtle her nickname foiled yet again your approval the... Sarcastic “ my sir, you look particularly menacing today. ” 25 Magic-marker Potter-style glasses on him while sleeps.